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A Darker Shade of Rose

 

 

LOVE Taps???

LOVE Taps???

As Wyatt grows into a young man it was bound to happen. My rose-colored specs would grow wiser and yes, darker. If you have ever happened upon this blog then you know I have an exuberance for life and all things Autism. Some may say an ’unrealistic exuberance’ but, I say that ‘u.e.’ doesn’t exist. IF you are exuberant about something, you believe in it wholeheartedly. I believe in Autism and I am not unrealistic about it. I live with it as an outsider looking in.  I feel it empathetically, I watch it’s every move, but I don’t experience it. That is Wyatt’s forte. His experience that I study and learn from. I learn for him and I learn for me. I learn for my day to day life, I learn for the culture and the world that we live in. It is my duty.  Honestly, I believe it is all of our duties!

The energy that is life, is contained and expressed in so many differing ways by each unique person. People have no groundwork on people. No one understands the basic framework we all operate under and how the working parts may differ and translate this world. Physically, chemically, electrically and emotionally.  Making “sense” of this is quite a delicate and combustible endeavor you must admit. Anything can go wrong and often does! People are amazing creatures and it’s time we researched ourselves….we should all be googling our own mind-body connections that create our behavior. Understand it and define it. OWN yourselves…mind and body. Recognize and understand who you are and how you feel and how that translates. You may be surprised where you find yourself fitting in. We are all on this spectrum of humanity and how we feel it the same and differently!

Not LESS!

What I want all people to learn is that my son is exactly like any other person. That is the part that most people don’t understand about him or Autism in general. The Autistic person’s heart, mind and soul are always intact. Perceiving and sensing this world through a different wiring/processing system. Able to communicate in wide ranging ways. In varying degrees from A to Z. My son’s system I call his…[Autism priZm]… seems to bend the stimulus in ways that his system can receive it. He expresses those transmissions with the  sounds and movements available and natural to him. Working on the HWY’s of his mind that are wired for traffic! Communicating in his way. At times a symphony or at times a storm of raw nerves. We try and adapt to each new day and these stimuli as they come.  Using tools we have learned to relieve or harness this energy and funnel it productively. This lifestyle transforms us into quite the flexible team. I have been wearing these rose-colored glasses since long before Wyatt was born. It’s who I am, making me a solid choice to be this boy’s mother. Everyday he continues to challenge my resolve, my attention to detail and my deductive powers. He is my Autism mentor.

HWY to understanding!

HWY to understanding!

Things can get dark...

Things can get dark…

 

Light and airy.....

Light and airy…..

 

Currently the onset of his teen years are playing havoc on his framework. He has surges of adrenaline and testosterone that his system has a hellish time translating. As if his blood is literally boiling through his veins. In these moments he ‘bangs it out’. How many of us rub, massage and press firmly (or even bang) on areas of discomfort we may have? When Wyatt has these phases of discomfort/frustration his system demands the same x 100 or x 1000… Make your own amplification to drown out your pain. It’s a common practice. It’s a ‘human thing’. We ourselves or family members all do the same in an array of techniques. Both positive and negative if we really look. People are blessed with a miraculous central nervous system. How each of us operates on that system and amplifies stimuli  is what we need to tune in to. Why NOT do a little fine tuning people? Dial your mind and body into what is really going on within your framework . Understand your system and the differing systems of others…..All shades of rose are beautiful light, dark and everything in between. So put on your spectrum specs and get real!

People do what they do because of the way that they 'feel' !!

People do what they do because of the way that they ‘feel’ !!

 

 

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Exploring for Informative Paddles!

Often times I have told people that my life having a child with Autism has felt like being up that proverbial creek. You know the creek, the one with the distastful name that you grow up hearing about. Adrift in a body of water using whatever you can find to shore up your ‘vessel’ so you can begin the long unnavigable paddle. The paddle towards forward progressions. Wherever those progressions may lie. This can be a very murky journey as you float along trying to gather information and connect professionals to your Autistic loved one in meaningful and productive ways. When your child/teen/adult use different connectors and receptors then these professionals are trained to work with. Sadly, at  other times even unwilling to work with. You are thrust into this role- captain of your ship -interpreting for and steering your family through a lifetime of safe harbors. Hoping you are lucky enough to find sea-worthy hands for the deck, plenty of paddles and enough wind for your sails! 

And this is where your life feels as “wild and untamed” as the deep blue sea. Where helping your child to progress becomes like pioneering uncharted territory against many currents. An epic exploratory journey comparable to the voyages of so many visionaries: Columbus, Magellan, Cook, Lewis, Clark and Pocahantas to name a mere few. People trudging forward by land or by sea not knowing what exactly awaits them. A perfect way to describe a day, a week, a month, a year, a LIFETIME on the Spectrum. The belief that what you are looking for IS out there gives you the strength to search on. After you are able to discern exactly what you are seeking …lol!! The “IT” that each of our loved ones on the Spectrum need is a very fluid thing and can frankly be alot of things. These entities can also shift like the tides. Add that to the wide ranges of variances we see between individuals on the Autism Spectrum. From mild, moderate, severe, profound….High Functioning, Low-functioning, Asperger’s, Autism. Then to further identify the differing needs of sensory and processing functions which can vary as much as that list of outdated desriptors. It can be a very complicated task. It’s a wide open space to be individually designed and defined. An unconquered ocean of possibilities for families to explore and chart throughout a lifetime. Open water.

In this exploratory ”Art of interpretation,” a families intuition tends to rule the day.  In the last 10 years since I have been adrift, mapping our course on the AutismHWY I see many new schools of thought regarding Autistic people. Brilliant voices of people with Autism profoundly shedding new light on the information. Things I can use to help understand my son’s needs. Amazing informational paddles I am so grateful for!! Social networking has us excitedly collaborating and sharing our experiences. Talk about informative friendships!! I have been  learning by leaps and bounds and am happy to be in this fleet of fine vessels. Feeling fully supported under the sun.

Our friends and supporters on the Spectrum provide these informative paddles to assist in the sometimes daunting Autistic journey. The more of us that connect  and share our experiences the better. No longer adrift and isolated but, now surrounded globally by people experiencing life as we know it floating beside you. The most comforting safe harbor I can possibly imagine. Knowing  friends that have been in our boat and can throw out a life-line when needed is priceless.  A main goal of this website and our mission in life! It truly helps to commiserate and brainstorm about living in a world where often times professionals seem to be playing “catch-up” in regards to the Autism Spectrum. I have seen so many self advocates and families building amazing ships and chartering positive courses. Helping people to explore the many possibilities! This teaming  momentum feels incredible and grows stronger each and everyday. As more people witness the power this community truly has to inform society and to help ”heal itself” the world will be in awe. “Healing” the problems created by misunderstandings and misinformation about Autism. Removing those stumbling blocks to comfort zones for our loved ones. I fully believe it can and will be done! When the Government, Medical and Educational Agencies of the world realize the growth in our community and the POWER of the Autistic VOICE they can use it to better explore the brain and all of human behavior.

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Cruzzzzzzzin the AutismHWY!

Some summertime!! Every year I am priveleged enough to enjoy a Santa Cruz vacation I look at this planet and say Ahhhhhhhhhh!! It is a miracle where we stand. It’s too bad so many of us don’t get that. That clarity that is needed. Needed to see that forest through the trees.The natural abilities we all have.  So often in life people become hung up on the status quo. If the status quo is a healthy one…than rock on. If not…let’s talk.

Autism has given me a gift. A gift that shifts your status quo…to something more human. My friends and I feel strongly about that. The gift of insight. Insight into the thought process. Yes you heard me correctly! Thinking about thinking!! Sounds ridiculous when you say it like that. But seriously, have you ever? It can do a mind good! Who has time to think about thinking …you say?  Well, we do…parents and people on the spectrum. We spend all day everyday trying to figure out why the brain acts and reacts  in certain ways and how we can harness these actions to get  positive results. We are a different breed.

One that becomes more insightful as time and Autism wear on.Insightful to the ways that sociality can be so cumbersome to life. Yes, we are social creatures that love and need to interact with each other. However, with all of the technology and out of control egos~ people have changed drastically. It feels as though so many of us have lost sight of what is truly important. People are in such a hurry as if life is a race. When  Autism  enters your life, you slow down …naturally. It is a process.

 Neuro Anatomist Jill Bolte Taylor literaly had a stroke to gain her beautiful insight. I only gave birth to Wyatt…haha!

Please CLICK on the link below to see what Ms. Taylor discovered! If you have a child on the spectrum…this will give you alot to think about!! This stroke of insight ~is crucial in understanding…why we do what we do. Or don’t…DO. Jill Bolte Taylor’s explainations of her comprehension /or lack of…during her stroke is stunningly familiar. The left-brain / right-brain and their amazing differences and functions are things we as “owner’s” should all understand!!  Imagine a population of people much more aware of their own brain function. I like the possibilities. No, I love the possibilities!

http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html

Maneuvering the AutismHWY has not been easy for any of us, I am quite sure.  With time it does become easier as you open yourself to the amazing forgotten connections that were God given…heart to heart and spirit to spirit. The depths of emotion are enormous. People assume our kids lack empathy and love. Well, I am here to tell you that is a huge misnomer. Our kids emotions are unencumbered by the ‘status quo’. Thus completely pure. No ulterior motives or underlying desires. When they decide to show their love ~it is undeniable.Something…Super~Natural!

So when you are out and about and you see someone on the AutismHWY…don’t feel sad or sorry for them. Allow them to merge into your lane! Give them the opportunity to be themselves and not hide their differing lifestyle away. Understand that there is a beauty in our difference. A contrast to normalcy…that we all need to examine. This new normalcy  that the 21st century has cultivated.Perhaps on closer examination you will see that “our normalcy” has alot of natural expression that has been lost in this fast paced world. Something we can all use alot more of.

Understand that our AutismHWY is an awesome road. Empowered by people on a mission for opportunity for our loved ones… civil acceptance and rights. Standing up for what we believe in …not what the television/ media tell us to believe in! We have become a society addicted to gadgetry, technology and celebrity. As we move further into the future we cannot erase our past and from where we have progressed. I believe  Autism is trying to tell the world just that.  ”Don’t get too far ahead of  yourselves….slow down” Look at the  fascinating natural technology that sits just atop your neck. We walk around with the most amazing technology on earth all day, everyday. Yet we  harness but a small fraction of it’s strength.  We have given the power over letting the gadgetry do it all.

Here is where we  on the spectrum can help humanity by stopping some of the madness and asking the world to just dial it back! Our lndividuals on the spectrum are telling us that the enviornment is polluted. Polluted with extra noise, extra gadgetry and extra distraction from what is natural and  pure. Autism has a way of bringing you back to the basics. The basics to living a …dare I say it…  NORMAL LIFE!!

PEACE~OUT!

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The Politics of Autism Awareness

Is there such a thing? I believe yes, there is.  As we approach the month of April this is heavy on my mind. I have developed an unstoppable need to create what I have dubbed “Useful Awareness.” Something I do not see a whole lot of. Unfortunate as that is to believe and say. I must. Simply put, I just  don’t see it. As I look around I see ribbons and lights.  When I’d much rather see “Lights, Cameras and ACTION!”

Action in the form of positive, helpful dialogue. Something seemingly rare. There are people out here trying to change the conversation…like http://www.rethinkingautism.com . Companies trying to CREATE CONVERSATION are  http://www.naturallyautistic.com  with their fantastic naturally Autistic People blogradio station, magazine and AWARDS season every fall!  http://AutismHWY.com was built to provide a platform for all of this great evolving dialogue. Our common GOAL, to be…interesting, uplifting and enlightening. Unfortunately not 3 adjectives the general population are used to associating with AUTISM.  

This is precisely my point. The sad message to be blue and march for money is old. We need NEW happy messages. The messages have to change. Embrace your lifes diagnosis, accept the things you can not shift. Shift the things you can. It is a much healthier way to live  and a much healthier way for the world to percieve AUTISM! What can we expect from everyone else if our own community is in constant anxiety.Fighting over scientific connundrums…and even the word, fighting over the semantics of the word Autism as opposed to the word Autistic. Ridiculous…to say the least. we have plenty of issues without manufacturing new ones!

 I would ask every parent of an Autistic child to meet an Autistic Adult. Look into the future…see it for what it is. NOT what you were programmed to believe it is. To me the issue is simple. Love Autism.Love my son. Accept Autistic People.  Accept my son. That is my entire Autism Awareness political AGENDA! My son will need life-long help. I need the world to stop messing around and understand Autism. That means learning about sensory issues and  learning about the differences in processing. Not some major companies money making “Awareness Light-up” campaign. Once everyone knows its Awareness month or day…can we please tell them something useful??

 When TV pays  attention to AUTISM it is generally very fleeting. Usually  geared at the general knowledge…that (I believe) isn’t even out there. So invariably every April…some recycled vaccination stories will pop up , usually accompanied by some celebrity with a book. What does that do to further along awareness? Looking up at a building that is lit blue…WHAT DOES THAT DO?

Does it clue people in to the fact that autistic people have marketable skills and our great employees? With mentoring and apprentice programs there will be room for  great success. Does the world realize that Autistic people contribute…by creating jobs? The greater population will benefit by the focus ASD can bring to life. People and technology have gone so far afield. Autism is a way to bring us back to the natural.  A way for people to re-connect with people. Working together by understanding the differences in brainstyles,  how each style compliments the other.To learn about these processing styles has been such an eye-opener for me. Making me VERY AWARE!! Aware that the only things that truly matter are NOT things. The things that matter are heart and soul. Maybe we should change it to Humanity Awareness month.

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